Sunday, September 20, 2009

HELLO LEILAANI .

Don't be silly brother,
( Be what? Silly sister? Silly dog?! )
you should know i'm already moving on.
( If he knows, you wouldn't be blogging about it. )
Ya i know it's hard but can't you see my effort ?
( To soften the HARD ?)
I'M DOING MY BEST, TRYING MY HARD.
( Trying your hard?! Is it a new name for some clothing or food ? )
I can't make it go away nor i can forget about it right ? (Eh?)
Give me your moral support la dont keep nag nag at me.
( Nag nag or is it nehneh ? I'd gladly reconstruct the sentence .
Give me your moral support and stop showing your nehneh to me. )
As you say , no one willing to walk this path & i did.
( No , you and your friends did, to be a successful AHLIAN path! )
I know what's going on & what it will be
& yet i still put nigh hopes in it, see ?
( That's just plain dumb . Nigh ? Correction. It's high.
Ahlians tend to create new and unidentified words , don't they all ?

We don't see you . Once you caught us doing that ,
you'll insist that we're staring ,
start calling your very own bunch of friends to deal with us.
Keep in mind, it's the 21st and law's the win lot. )
what i get ? the higher hope i have, the deeper i fall.
( Higher hope , deeper fall ? Why are you still here btw ? )
Treat it as expensitive lesson, i know i know.
( Refer back to top. )
ALL I KNOW LA :D silly ? if i'm not silly you all will dote me meh ?
( What a revelation , we have never heard. )
What's wrong with me this year.
i thought it'll be much better than last year
but it became much worser than this year.
( You thought ?! You finally start your brain's engine ! Thinking! )
Where's my positive thinking ?

maybe it's because of what i been through.
( Where's your positive thinking? Hiding under your blanket ? )

i cant blame people ,
cause they didn't be through & they did not understand .
( Wtf are you talking about? WTFWTFWTF. )
So what if they put themselves in my shoes.
( Noone ever wants to be in your shoes , any~ )
they still didn't know what's the feeling & how painful i'm.
( They don't know! Not didnt .
How painful you are or is it how you're a pain in their asses ?
You're getting so alien now.

Wait , you're the newer version. Ah-lian! )
Patheic right. Oh damn it.Lazy for school. Same as usual ,
there's no fucking motivation. No nothing,
( For goodness, it's pathetic!
And we don't understand a heck of what you're gabbling about .
It's lazy to go to school anyway.

School motivates you to study? Ugh.
Get your fuckin' ass to sch and you're your very own motivation .
My bad, you don't do school, you do AHBENGS .
Apparently , motivation's gone away with

your positive thinking and chasity belt .)
I want to studying but somehow i just dont get it.
( There's no ing after to
and we still don't get what you're trying to say. )
Maths, maths maths. ARGHGHGHG
help me solve all my questions marks in my bloody head
& get me a so called super smart head. D:
( You've ??? in your head instead of a brain .
Now you're gonna change your head. You're scaring me, really.
Cards on the table. Where are you from ?!! )

Saturday, September 19, 2009

hello people. I had a romantic evening out with my YY. It's 1 in the morning and yet im still sitting infront of the computer trying to think of what to write to entertain you fellow faithful readers. well you guys read without leaving any comments. You gonna tell me what you want to read about and i will further elaborate into the story, right? . Anyway, im just gonna pick out random topics to talk about. So just bear with me.

Well, there's a story i am going to share with you guys. I used to have afew ahbeng friends .. Well,it's inevitable. Sometimes you just can't avoid friends like them .. you would still have 1 or 2 in your life.. uh.. but i doubt they are reading this blog..hmm.. This Ah beng friend of mine held a birthday barbeque at some parks nearby. He invited me so i thought"well,no harm going , right?" yeah uh so i went. His little sister bought her ahlian friend.. I forgot her name but i remembered it starts with a P. So let's call this ahlian "P". She was dressed in some "blossom" ( you know this shop? there's 1 at cineleisure second floor?") . I can still remember clearly that top was so tight that her cleavage could be seen worHzxxsss !!! She started flirting around and i didn't quite click along with anyone over there..as they were all.. lians and bengs..
So she started talking to this skinny ahbeng and they started flirting with each other.. Well, i was rather tired so i went home pretty early. The next day, i heard from my friend that after the bbq, they went over to their house and had sex. WOW, only knowing each other for like what, 7, 8 hours? Later on, they became a couple and i heard that guy was so madly in love with her that he hopped over to her house everyday and demand some hot passionate sex. She got so tired and she wanted to break up with him. Anyway, she's the first girl the guy had sex with but..he's like the ..dont know how many guys she had had sex with already. She's the whore of the lians. Yes and that BBQ was somewhere 3years ago in 2006 november i remember clearly.

CHAO AHLIAN.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

WRITTEN BY: AM

the ahlians in my school went MIA. i don't know where have they been recently but it seems that life's bored without them. They are my main source of entertain.. sigh..

I don't see why ahlians all have to look identical to each other. They do not have a style of their own. mofos. no creativity!

There was this ahlian's blog which i stumbled upon.
She likes using this word " Aftermath"
are you trying to say? "afterthat" ? i don't understand why she has to act like she's some kind of educated slumdog. You Aftermath? I Afterscience Afterchemistry AfterPE Afterrecess.
ㅗ ㅗ ㅗ

Now,im going extreme.
These ahlians would go to their boyfriend house after their boyfriends knock off from work and stay there until the next day. I don't know what the boyfriend's family think about that girl.Wait. Ahbengs' family don't even care about them Their parents are probably lao ahbengs and lao ahlians to produce such a piece of crap! Ahlians just want sex all day, to them ,there isn't such thing as love, it's just finding a guy equally as uneducated as them and sleep with them and produce identical future ahlians and ahbengs. If they can't afford to give their children good life then please use condom or try other ways!!! Even if they get pregnant i would suggest them to have an abortion. The baby is going to grow up in an environment with violence and uneducated parents who can't even send them to nursery.

Some ahlians think that failing N level and after which, taking up private diploma courses could actually get them far. Stop daydreaming and slap yourself to the harsh reality. You failed your Nlevel, barely even passing at least 3 pathetic subjects and you can even tell everyone you want to go for a diploma in a private school? It's either you want the school to earn your money or simply you just want to tell people you are actually educated? For once, i merely tagged on this ahlian's blog and scolded her "uneducated" and she claimed that she had finished her Nlevels.
Yeah, you think N level is much more better than A levels , is that so?

Ahlians like to take a ride on their ahbeng boyfriends' motorbike and go geylang to eat and drink at night. They also like to hang around shopping malls and arcade centre. When they are bored,they would just randomly pick pretty or attractive looking girls to pick on. As for ahbengs,they would just pick on any guys who's more attractive than them. Wait, anyone is more attractive than ahbengs. Isnt that so?

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

WRITTEN BY : YY

So what if this is an EFF THE AHLIANS blog .
FECK THE AHBENGS TOO ! ( They begin with an AH , no ? )
It's just hopelessly unbearable when it comes to this prematures .
Uhm . NEVER-MATURE is more of an appropriate term .

Starring # - ( didn't mean to stare at you , don't "diao zhui" )
#'s in sight every half an hour
eg. shouting to another feckin' ahbeng/wannabe and similar actions .
Deprive of attention + misguided attempt to seek attention ? Duh .

Factors to being an ahbeng (updated) :
1 ) Pierced earlobes with earrings that literally exclaim "HELLO!PUKE!"
2 ) Pierced tongue and must always "play" with the tonguestud
so that everyone'd see that HE'S PIERCED HIS TONGUE! WOW!
3 ) Bag hung very , very low ( split in your pants ? )
4 ) Pierced eyebrows ? Lips ? You name it , they pierced it .
5 ) Fringe's covering 3/4 of the face ,
hair's "spiked" enough to compete with a durian .
( I can expect the durians rolling away as fast as they can
and as far as possible )
6 ) Backpack colour of : white ? fuchsia pink ? Ew , distasteful .
7 ) SLOPPY . Is it called "ai mai" in hokkien ?
( Personally , dialects are mostly total alien )
8 ) In every sentence you speak ,
there must be a "CHEEBYE" and "KANINA" .
9 ) Engerleesh must be
" Dare ah soh manly tingsx two lern form yawr bradersx "
10 ) In a "gang" , "taken care of" and too obvious to state ,
in a relationship with an Ahlian .

Wait a minute ,
being boyfriend and girlfriend for weeks count as a relationship ?
Didn't know dating scene has been modified to this .
I'm truly horrified ! Gosh .

Excuse me .
Attention back to # , he has all the requirements !
He thinks it's really cool to own them anyway ,
like some kind of admirable trait . Freak .
Oh dear , i've forgotten what i'm suppose to write about him .
Actually , i've decided to be kind .
Felt like i've done some charitywork :):):)

Lovely day to revise chapters of Chemistry !
Shall sip coffee , nibble on croissants
and enjoy the cool weather with my tutor .
Till then , with neither love nor hatred .
WRITTEN BY: AM
hey guys have your ever seen a pig blogging?i doubt so.
haha well here's a link to a blogsite of a fat ahlian !

http://thebeautiful-disasters.blogspot.com/

she calls herself "gui gui" i don't know if it means turtle turtle or ghost ghost?lol
but a more appropriate nickname for her would be "zhuzhu"

She's fat and she has nostrils the size of the opening of your bottle drinks.
please,im not lying she really looks like a pig ! *oink oink*
she looks like a pig in every photo and look out for her ahlian counterparts!!

Monday, September 14, 2009

AH LIAN'S WISHLIST

WRITTEN BY: AM

wonder what ahlians always wish for?

i wish to pass my N level worh
me & laogong's 1 year anniversary
newfuture jeans ! ^_^ ( all colors worh)
chanel makeup ! ( who will buy for me i will lurbe you sho much)
find a new job at bugis street
hopefully can go into simei ITE
that top $29.90
mphosis clothes!
fake eyelashes!
BIG winnie the pooh (Who will buy fer me worhsz?)

17th burthday! (sho i can legally have sex with my ahbeng bf)
another piercing!
another tattoo!
another boyfriend!
another nickname for myself! ( xiiao pie, xiiao jibai)

Ahlians are now setting up blogshops to sell away their ahlian fashion !!
They want you to buy from them and so they can use the money to buy even more ahlian stuff!
maybe they must sell away their whole collection of bugis hot pants to save up for a 70 dollars dior powder? KE LIAN WORHZ

Anyway,i will be looking into various ahlian blogs and come back to update on their typical ahlian wishlist. ;) stay tune.

let's give a warm welcome to our 2 new bloggers here.
now we are a team of 4 !
check out their 2 new posts below :)

Hear , hear .

WRITTEN BY: YY

Hello to those who's greatly appreciative of the blog's presence .
If you must know , i'm not the initial author *winks*
How's the juice so far ? Pretty interesting and forthright ?!

Eh eh .
It so makes you wanna barf when Ahlians get Luxury goods
and show it off , 'round and 'round till the piece's beat and torn .
And then , they're happy . Weird ? Uh-huh .

That's because they're afraid that none
will know that they're carrying genuine ones .
" Ni dong hor , wo mai zhe ge baobao hor ,
yi qian kuai leh , wapianq , xin tong lorhsxsx "
Get something within your ability then !
None wants to hear the story , on loop .

Worst to worst ,
they'll come to you and cling .
Begging you to get things they've eyed on !
Like " Mai gei wo lah , wo hui hen ai nisxsxsxsx de "
Uhm-mm .

When they gone on shopping trip ,
they'll tell you about the whole fuckin' trip ,
to an inch of its life or much thinner .
" Todai , we went ta shoppinq wib Blee blaa ,
wi saw dhish makeup horhhhx ....... "
I can continue in that language , not any second longer .

The climax of the whole entry , conversation etc :
the part where they tell you the price !
Eg - Bra : $79.90 , oooooh ,
now we know how much there is , underneath your clothes .
Haven't you know the cost of depreciation ?
By the end of month , your bra will be worth up to zero cents ,
maybe negative , spare me the calculation !
( I'm having maths ppr tomorrow ! )
That's the first item on board by the way .

Top : $39.90
Bottom : $49.90
* registers price written on the blog *


The only one page in magazine that's titled
" THINGS UNDER $100/$50 OR LESS "
Infringement of intellectual property .

Gosh , i haven't got all day .
Time's better spend on something yawn-inducing like
- Mathematics -

Sunday, September 13, 2009

WRITTEN BY: AM
Okay, so im back. so sad, only have 1 follower :(
anyway yesterday i was chatting with B and we were talking about ahlians and ahbengs in lanshop.
When you go dota in the lanshop and you own those ahbengs' cheap asses, they would cruise the lanshop and find who is the CHEEBYE KIA who pawn them in the game and start threatening and resorting to all the gangsterism to resolve the issue. Why bother? you lost and just admit defeat. What for go around looking for the person who owned you? you want to let the whole lanshop know that you lose is it? If not what are you trying to show people? "wow this ahbeng so cool worhz!!!! beat and scold people in lanshop.. hao shuai worh". If you cannot afford to lose,then what for start the game? A game means a fair match, if you want to play fair , then face defeat like a man! Oh i forgot ahbengs are just kids...lols.

Please lorh
look at yourselves.
Ah Bengs
you buy cheap bleach from ang mo kio central probaby $1.50 for a 200ml of bleach and go home with your "brothers"
and help each other bleach the hair until become don't know what color. red? orange?brown?gold?
Even buy cigg also need 10 people share the cigg money. so pathetic. no money smoke then quit la, right or not?
Tshirt leh, your can wear the same stinky shirt for the whole week without changing it. Maybe in your closet only have 3 shirts and 1 pair of jeans. maybe 3 pairs. 3 for 10 dollars . Buy from mustafa one right? :)


Ah Lians.
Favourite hangouts:bugis street. What? now singapore ION open already your want go infest that place is it? Comeon,what for open so many shopping centres?Do you want know the reason why? Because we want to clearly segregate you ahlians from us normal citizens. You want to make bugis your territory, go ahead, don't come and pollute the clean air at ION or Wisma Atria..Whatever hangout places that ARE NOT MEANT for you lians. You girls are no difference,cheap hair bleach. Oh yes,ahlians like straight rebond hair.. Smoking leh? take ciggs from their ahbeng boyfriends lorh! Hmm, very long never see ahlians already!! Cos i'd been at home almost all the time, i need to go bugis and start snapping pictures and update on the latest ahlian fashion. You guys know anot?! ahlians these days also go for brand leh. They want gucci want chloe want LV want this want that. You want so many things, you either go bugis and sell clothes if not go and sell your body. I bet anyone would offer any reasonable price. Ahlians are either too skinny or too fat. too flat or too thick. NO SHAME. makeup put so thick. Still want to use dior and all the high class brand for foundation ah? No need lah, when you smoke,the smoke from the cigg sticks on your face,what for buy such expensive foundation. Go use the money buy condoms or save up for abortion fees. If you realise, ahlians don't abort worh. why? cos they do not have the money to go for abortion and their ahbeng boyfriends also have no $$$ support the girl go abortion there ending up with a shotgun marriage and the baby come out also NOT 3 NOT 4(bu san bu shi). Agree? Just read from an ahlian blog that she went to sign up for private course at some private school !! she think by getting a private diploma she can go far? cmon, she don't even have olevels cert , only a pathetic piece of Nlevel cert and she thinks that she can feed her and her boyfriend by getting a private diploma? let's not even go to the subject of graduation. I doubt she can graduate.Just look at their attitude man!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

WRITTEN BY: AM
wah chio leh. you guys don't just read, can or not? comment also lah. show your support and pass the love. pass it to your friends,your family your neighbours and your fellow ahlian schoolmates. Let them discover something new about themselves. So far i opened this blog for only a day and i've got 52 hits! not bad not bad. It shows that you people bother to check out cool links i've posted on facebook. I know you are waiting for some juiciest stuff from ahlians. Well let me recall if theres any story told to me about ahlians. *thinking in process*
Oh yes ! that's right now i remember. You know, ahlians are like disease, it's worse than h1n1 or SARS,it spread faster than anything else. 1 in 3 out of your friends might already have some sort of ahlian symptoms. Hmm... better be careful.

There was one time when i was out with my friends. I still remember it was new year's eve. Yeah, we want to go countdown!! It was then ah lian spoilt my mood. My friend suggested to meet her friend awhile and catch up ( of course my friend isn't an ahlian!) but you know everyone has all types of friends. Even you can't deny you have at least 1 xiaopinkiie xiaocuttie xiaojiajia as your friend right? DON'T LOOK AWAY! I KNOW YOU HAVE !!! AHAHA!
Well, then i saw her friend. Omg. Her face is already Ahlian, don't even have to look at the body. She looks at me up and down and i don't even bother to look at her. I just hurried my friend and told her to " talk quicky and let's go". That ahlian was probably wearing a 3 dollar spagetti top from far east, a 8 dollar black skirt from bugis street, and layers and layers of thick makeup probably from maybelline or silkygirl. If you realise, ahlians thesedays are upgrading themselves ok!! they don't use what maybelline already hor. They are getting into the trend of Dior , Chanel foundations and even eyeing gucci and louis vuitton bag. How sweet. Since ahlians upgraded themselves, shouldent we upgrade ourselves and start using hermes bag and pamper ourselves with all the luxourious goods? Yes, we should. Ahlians are following trends!!! Anyway back to that ahlian whom i saw. Yeah, and she was probably wearing some heels or flats from mphosis? well correct me if im wrong. Well, i didn't realise she was BUAYSONG with me until afew days later my friend told me that ahlian friend of hers wasn't too happy when she sees me. Yeah i know cos i so much high class than her. Can't Help It.

It was until a few days ago my friend told me that her ahlian friend actually asked my friend " your friend see me not happy is it?" Yes! it's relatively and absolutely true! I don't like ahlians and she happened to fall into that category should i act like I LIKE HER? no way. So my friend told her "yeah she doesnt like you" and that ahlian continue asking why and such . Comeon, she don't have to dig for an answer the answer is in the mirror!! yes. she will go and look at the mirror and there she goes, the answer she had been waiting to hear..
Anyway that ahlian has a blog and im a very frequent reader.Comeon, im not a fan. Sometimes you know, you don't need gag tv to crack you up but you can simply favourite a few ahlians blog, go in and laugh at how they take photos. Man, im sure that would entertain you more than enough.

So her blog is interesting,she tells people about her recent buys, her new perfume or her new gucci bag. Ok, ahlians also like to show off right. Not easy for them to buy a gucci bag you know!!
and she likes taking a picture with herself taking a ciggarette inbetween her fingers. WHY!! why show people you smoke? you want people to think " oh she's so cool. she's a smoker.wow" what's so cool about taking a photo with a ciggarette inbetween your fingers. If you want to read you have to request for it. Leave a comment or message or whatsoever. AHLIAN BLOG LEH, YOU THINK LET YOU ACCESS IT SO EASILY AH. you must be an ahlian hater or something to appreciate her blog. Know anot?

Anyway , i will be heading off to the airport in a shortwhile. I will try to blog while im abroad. Don't miss me too much. I will update with the most juiciest gossip about our national's disgrace. So long.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

XIAO JIAWEN

Alright, let me start off with a very ridiculous experience with an ahlian from my school.I would only reveal that ahlian's "so-called" nickname.
She calls herself "xiaojiawen" and she had this initial written on her shoulder bag as well.
Like WTF? who the hell would take a permanent marker and write "xiiaojiawen" on their bag?
Let everyone in the frigging world know that they are some kind of ahlian? I don't know why the hell would ahlians write a "xiao" or "xiiao" or whatever infront of their real names.
Are they trying to send a message to the public that they are actually small in size or they are still small in their mind. Immature dumb idiots. I mean, come on,there's no better phrase to describe these idiots.

Alright, let's go back to that xiaojiawen girl. She's probably around 14?15?I DON'T KNOW SHE LOOKS LIKE 12 TO ME. Alright, why would i ever bump into an ahlian in my school? well, i mean she's not suppose to blend well in this school . The first time i ever seen her was also the first time she DIAO me WORHZx. Do you think i actually have so much time to bother about who's staring at me and what's not. I was at the school bus stop waiting for my bus to come when these two girls came and stood right infront of me maybe like 2cm directly infront of me. If she swings her head maybe her hair could slap me right in the face. So i was thinking to myself "what the hell are these girls doing here? why are they staring so close to me". It was then i saw "xiiaojiawen" written on her bag. Remember? Ahlians like to call themselves "xiao"-something. yeah so i thought to myself "sure enough this must be another typical ahlian from singapore." I couldn't be bothered much about it.

She keeps staring at me and i was thinking to myself, " do i even know this single eyelid skinny little mysterious twit?" Well, definitely not. The next day i had PE lesson and the little ahlian was also having her PE lesson! she was sitting directly opposite me! She stared at me again and whispered something to her friend sitting beside her. It must be the usual gossip of girls whom they are jealous of. Well, maybe they were just jealous about me i thought. (im not self praising over here).

I was really curious. Why do these girls want to look and stare at me like im some kind of god or something? I went over and asked this boy from my class "do you know that xiiaojiawen girl?"
and he said something like "oh yeah,she's ahlian she's from Ang soon tong" . Huh? who the hell cares whether she's an lian or she's from ang soon tong or what crap. Holy shit. Comeon, she chup what gang? Does anyone actually cares? call her gan jie gan kor or what gan pa gan mama all the god brother,sister,mother,father great grandmother i also don't care. Ahlian chup gangs, what do we chup? We chup the police!!! Duh, it's like, useless. Call your whole god family or you ahlian gang members or your gang leader with tattoos all over his body does not scare me. Once this little ahlian come and confront me, what will i do? Call the police la! so easy.
i was thinking the moment she starts disturbing me in a way or other,i would go to the nearest police station make report already. HAhaHA! She is so small and thin i mean even if she wants to fight me i could easily crush her bones or something.

here are some facts i found out about this ahlian:
1) she's retained in secondary 2 because she is so dumb !!
2) she is from normal academic. ( how can she even fail secondary 2 normal(A) promotion exam)
3) she's from ang soon tong
4) she has don't know how many gang member friends ( you think i scare ah?)
5) she has the typical ahlian look that other 1,000,000 other ahlian possesses that i had to look at her for at least 1 minute to figure out she is actually that "xiaojiawen" instead of "xiaopiggy", "xiaopurple" or "xiaoahlian" AHAHHA well, im very sure there's a handful of other ahlians in the school with similar features.

Alright, where did we stop? Oh yes, I could easily crush her bones!
A day or two after the PE lesson, i noticed someone who looks like her standing at the corner of the stairs. (look,i can't be certain it was her as there were many ahlians with the same look. Long fringle,side parting, tie their hair superhigh, single eyelids,loud boorish behaviour.) so i just ignored and looked away. It was then afew minutes later my friend pointed out to me the ahlian was telling her friend that i was staring at her and she very "BUAYSONG" with me. So i went to find her ahlian friend and tell her friend " who does she think she is? why would people want to stare at her"

These ahlians think that they are so pretty, so highclass, only people stare at them,they don't stare at people.Who wants to stare at their flat chest! godness gracious me.
Very typical ahlian behaviour. They were the ones who stare at people they are not happy with and so ironically,they accused others of staring at them. What a joke!

P.S: im not that young. im at least afew years older than her.
Hello. Wow a new creation! This blog is specially dedicated to our dearest fellow ahlians from all over Singapore. I hope you readers,friends,whatever would help to promote this blog to your peers and hopefully to the Ahlians as well. Why do we hate ahlians so much? well, it isn't our fault. They choose to put themselves in that position by degrading themselves through their actions. I could not imagine why would one choose to stoop to such level and make everyone in this society hate them. Nevertheless, i had tried to ignore them as much as i could but they seem to love me so much by staring at me all the time, worshipping me as if im their "tao" ( leader of the gang). Should i feel honorable for getting such attention from them?

Well, what makes me want to start this blog? I don't know. Probably because i am no longer tolerant of those Ah Lians in my school and everywhere else. I don't even think they deserve any attention from me. However, i am here for a purpose, not for promoting them like some kind of product.


They're just simply disgusting,eww, dogs of their "tao" always following them or whatever instructions that are given to them so as to get their protections in return. Their "tao" are older then them but yet not mature at all. Ahlians think that everything can be resolve by fighting,but too bad,it doesn't. I hope that those ahlians would fight their way to failures in life,and that is a fact.

This is the birth of the EFF THE AHLIANS BLOG
please give your support and comment. Thankyou.